There’s nothing less appealing to a potential partner than feeling as though that they’re nothing more than a warm hole or body that’s filling a slot marked “girlfriend”.
The more desperate you are to get what you want, whether it be sex or a relationship, the more likely it will slip through your fingers.
If, for example, you believe that only “alpha” – for a suitably mistaken definition of “alpha” men get women, then that will be part of your reality.
Not because it’s notice or pay heed to that which confirms your pre-existing belief.
On a practical level, desperation hurts you in a multitude of ways.
You’re less likely to meet someone you would consider you will be turned off when they realize that any warm body will do and still more will assume that there must be a reason why you’ve been refused so often.
Nowhere was this more apparent than in the early days of the Pick Up community, when people assumed that one of the secrets of success with meeting women is to “peacock”; that is, dress up in exotic or even outlandish ways in order to get attention.
Suddenly, you couldn’t swing a dead cat in a bar without hitting someone trying to rock a fuzzy top-hat and black nail polish or a shiny silk jacket, spiky earrings and New Rock boots.
They could be swapped out for the nearest stranger.
Nobody likes feeling like an interchangeable, anonymous cog, easily replaceable and ultimately unmemorable.
Let me paint a common story for you: It’s been a while since you’ve started trying to get better at dating and it seems like you’re no further along than you have been before. The more posts you read, the more approaches you make… The things that hold us back in dating almost always systematically bleed into the other parts of our lives as well and it’s only when we can be honest with ourselves, confront and address these issues that we can manage to move forward and start making the progress we As I’ve mentioned before: negativity is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Nerd Love, even in myself in different aspects of my daily life.
The problem of course is that while Mystery was able to get away with dressing like a Hot Topic jumped him in a dark alley, he’s a professional magician; dressing weird comes with the territory.